so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
