yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
