She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
