before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
vagina is talking i cant
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
