I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
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