? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
