we're blogging at a bar
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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