Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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