Are we in a gay sports bar?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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