I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
