drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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