Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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