definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
