Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
