You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
