I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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