doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Randomize
