I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
