My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
a search helicopter?!
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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