omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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