Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
