in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
