I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
