check it out our google latitudes are spooning
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
