Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Boobs speak an international language.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Dick very happy bro
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
