omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize
