just come out here and I will go home with you...
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
