it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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