You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I look better un-naked...
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
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