i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
