why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We don't watch enough power rangers
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
