Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Randomize