am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
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