it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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