Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize