he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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