I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
