i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Randomize
