if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
