I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Is it because I queefed?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize