Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
