ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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