Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
