erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
sex in a hospital.. check
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize