Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
