He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
last night I used snow as a chaser
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
