after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
