it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
you inspire me to be a worse person
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
