I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
