we made out on top of his cat.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
