sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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