Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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